exsanguination

RC deWinter

 

you were my dark bloody desire for far too long

your demon ink invaded every capillary of my being

staining me blueblack from inside out

i had to cut my wrists to bleed you out

and now i languish

listless

anemic

 

there is no fire in my blood

my dreams are too much like the everyday

flat neutrals on a fuzzy screen

i need a touch of the demonic

but you –

you

were an overdose

 

i wonder if i can correct my course

and not fix every wheel for the house

find a lover who will raise me from the dead

without the need to own my very soul

but even if – miraculous – i do

can i control my need for brimstone’s bite

or will i once again suck too much smoke?

 

***

RC deWinter’s poetry is anthologized in Uno: A Poetry Anthology (Verian Thomas, 2002), New York City Haiku (NY Times, 2017), Cowboys & Cocktails: Poetry from the True Grit Saloon (Brick Street Poetry, April 2019), Havik (Las Positas College, May 2019), Castabout Literature (Dantoin/Hilgart, June 2019), The Flickering Light (Scars Publications, June 2019), Nature In The Now (Tiny Seed Press, August 2019), in print in 2River View, Down in the Dirt, Genre Urban Arts, Meat For Tea: The Valley Review, Pilcrow & Dagger, Pink Panther Magazine, Scarlet Leaf Review, The New York Times and in numerous online literary journals.