Katharina Bezushko


Thermodynamic Psychology

Like the hourglass
I am entropic:
Sand spills from the top
And sinks to the bottom;
But spun upon my axis, then
All the grains fall down again.


I can be capricious as the sea,
Under control of extrinsic powers
The current below, and the undertow,
And above the winds and showers.

Seeds of Focus

I stomp and trip through the garden
The air is hot; the flowers bright and sweet:
I water them, one at a time —
And often, I nurture the weeds as well
Because I cannot tell the difference.


I could run forever —
I could fly!
Transcend the earth below and touch the sky!

Hurtling through space, I am untethered —
And — I realize far too late — unfeathered —


The surface is above me; I can see it.
I paddle upward, paddle upward, paddle upward . . .
And always, there is debris in my way . . .
I reach and comb and tear,
And am tangled and ensnared . . .
Hands bound, feet bound, heart bound . . .
Sinking . . .
The surface slips away
And I am drowned.

The summit is above me; I can see it
I climb upward, climb upward, climb upward . . .
And always, there are rocks in my way . . .
I chip and dodge and scale,
And am beaten and impaled
Arms broken, legs bloodied, heart battered. . .
Tumbling . . .
The summit falls away
And I am shattered.

I cannot swim, cannot climb, cannot rise . . .
I am always in my way.


The earth
That nurtures and sustains us all
Spins and whirls in space —
Turning, changing, fluctuating
Gathering speed centripetally.
And like the earth,
I am bipolar and I spin —
If you find my cycles dizzying,
It is merely because
My axis is
So relatively small.





As a single parent, Katharina Bezushko spent several years pouring her love of language into the ears of her children, and now she is endeavoring to share her words with a new audience.